Phase Next

Where’s the emoji that clearly

Articulates that this diet rice cake

Tastes like frustrated cardboard

Just barely soft enough not to chip my tooth

I need an emoji for this workout

I don’t want to do, yet I will do

‘Cause I don’t want to hear

That scale screaming at me like it’s lost its damn mind

I need an emoji that says I’m trying to make

This big bottle of water

Taste like a strawberry and cream frappacunio

Where’s the emoji for You Make Me So Sick Right Now

But I’m not going nowhere no time soon, though

You still get on my nerves

I need an emoji that adequately screams

I want to make a resolution for the New Year, yet I always break them

So I won’t, but I really want to

Sometimes I just wish I could find an emoji

That makes it clear that I’ve decided

This adult thing is hard… I’ll try again in a few years

Yet I just can’t find the emoji on any app on my phone